Weekend Score: Girls, 2; Sleep, 0

While we had a lovely visit with my friend J in podunk Hollidaysburg, Pennsylvania, I came to Monday morning utterly exhausted.

The girls decided that 5:30 in the morning was a perfectly reasonable time to start on Saturday. Having consumed three glasses of red wine in quick succession the night before, and getting to bed around midnight, my sour stomach and I felt much differently.

I managed to survive until about 9 a.m., when J graciously brought me Tylenol and ginger ale from the convenience store, and then took the children for a walk. After about 45 minutes of utter stillness with my eyes closed, the Tylenol did its work, and I managed to shower and get dressed.

Kate decided to try for consciousness Sunday morning at 5:30, too, but I brought her into bed with me, and we managed to doze off again until the more decent hour of 7 a.m. Red wine had been wisely avoided on Saturday night, although I did have a tasty Dogfish Head IPA, so I did not have to relive that pain.

The weather was less than optimal, but we managed to keep the girls entertained over two days with new-to-them toys, walks when it wasn’t raining, a playground nearby, play-doh, and an indoor play area complete with the Germ-Laden Ball Pit of Doom (pictures to come). Mealtimes and evenings were low-key, and included crockpot mac ‘n’ cheese (need recipe, J) and a chick-flick on Oxygen (The Notebook; mraw to Ryan Gosling, but pretty hokey none-the-less), a prerequisite for girl time.

Driving with the girls was stressful, as per usual, and Flora saved her very worst behavior for the final 30 minutes of the drive home. I mean, child, we are 30 minutes away from the front door. Chillax, as they say in the ‘hood.

After fighting the fruit flies with vinegar-, wine-, and apple core-loaded traps, Dan braved Wal-Mart on Sunday night to get real fly traps. They seem to be working thus far (the organic traps worked, too, but not in nearly the same numbers as the store-bought traps). I will be undertaking a serious sanitizing of the kitchen in the coming weeks. Oh joy.

So, yeah, I’m tired. Suggestions for pick-me-ups are more than welcome. I’m staring down a daunting week, and I could use some positivity. Thanks.

That’s a Switch

Monkey has gone from being terrified of bugs to terrorizing them.

She picks up ants. Have you even seen an ant that’s been picked up by a 4-and-a-half year old? Poor thing is usually half squished and twitching. If she manages to not squish it, she declares that she is naming it Andy and bringing it home to be her pet.

I’ve told her we will get her an ant farm (for Christmas or her birthday, of course), but I’m not sure I can take the guilt of a greater number of damaged ants until then. She wants to pick up every ant she sees.

This past weekend, she also picked on a little white caterpillar, and in attempting to transport it from our front porch to a tree, dropped it in a bucket of water by accident. The caterpillar dragged itself out of the water, so it didn’t drown at least.

But a water-logged caterpillar is even more pathetic than a squished ant.

The other thing she did recently? Trapped a potato bug in a bucket with a lid. Declared it was her pet. I forgot to go back and let the thing out. That’ll haunt me.

I guess the alternative is worse. Unless she ends up bringing ants into my house. That will make for a very unhappy mama.

Weekend Update:
I cannot say enough nice things about my Spa Day with J and A at this place.

Just. Wow. Just go. Get your favorite girlfriends, your significant other, your mom — anyone, really — and head to Bedford. It’s less than two hours away, and spa services come with a luxurious Eternal Spring bath ritual that will almost make that massage redundant. It’s like a facial for your whole body.

In short, it was lovely. Much needed. A nice time with great friends. Next time, I want it to last longer!


I am leaving for the spa shortly. Spa Day is standing in for Girlie Weekend this year. J moved to BillieHollidaysburg in March, and L had a baby sister for her daughter at the end of June (wasn’t that nice of her?). So A & I are heading to a spa near J for 24+ hours of pampering, plus champagne and strawberries.

Note to self: Pick up strawberries.

No beach, but no plane ride either. A trade off I can live with.

I will be offline and child-free. See you on the other side.


I learned a few things yesterday:

1. Monkey knows all the words to “Kids” by MGMT.
2. Monkey really hates Louis Armstrong’s version of “It’s a Wonderful World”. “It’s not a wonderful world,” she cried in response when I wouldn’t skip it. “It’s just not.”
3. ABBA, the original group, isn’t together anymore. Although, contrary to rumor, they are not dead.
4. I was clearly spoiled by Mamma Mia! I expected some fabulous dance numbers. But the costumes were disco-licious.
5. Clearly, I will go to just about any lengths to spend time with my best friends.

Okay, I already knew that.

When the Steelers won the Super Bowl one year in the ’70s, the montage afterward was set to ABBA’s “Winner Takes it All”. Does anyone else remember this? N says it was 1979, after the Steelers beat the L.A. Rams. I’m inclined to believe her because N has a memory like a photo album. I remember feeling bad for the losing team because of that song. That’s the video I was looking to put here. Instead, you get “Dancing Queen”. Feel free to picture me dancing ecstatically to it — wearing black.

Weekend Recap: With Pictures!

I know, I know: it’s Thursday.

But this is what I got.

From Saturday:
Wedding Party

Some of Us Girls (That’s Misfit Hausfrau on the right)

Bride and Groom: First Dance

From Sunday:

“What Chocolate Bunny?”

“These are not the Chocolate-Eating Droids You’re Looking For.”

Dry Clothes I

Dry Clothes II

Things I Learned at (or Because of) My Friends’ Wedding

1. Purple is the perfect color for a wedding.
2. St. Paul can be funny.
3. I must be doing something right. Everyone told me how fantastic I looked.
4. A kilt makes a gay man look straight. Until he dances with his boyfriend.
5. Too much wine can have the same effect on a man as too much whiskey.
6. My children are capable of getting themselves breakfast. However, left to their own devices, they will each eat a six-inch-tall hollow chocolate bunny instead of something sensible like Cinnamon Toast Crunch.
7. Mild hangovers and kids are doable until about 5 o’clock.
8. A three-day weekend is perfect for a wedding.


I had this awesome post for last Thursday all ready to go. It was about how much I was looking forward to Girlie Weekend, and cute stories about my kids, and how Monkey was doing about me going on vacation (not so good), and so on. And it was going to include these pictures:

Aren’t they cute?

But due to forgetting to email it to myself, and a half day of work, a pedicure, and a bikini wax on Thursday, and issues WordPress has with Safari, and not getting home until 3 p.m., and not being completely packed, and needing to get to the airport — well, it just didn’t get here. Too bad, because it was a good post.

But then I went away for 3 nights and 3 days, without children and a spouse.

There was some of this:

And plenty of this:

And this was nice:

And we got some horses at Brigadoon (the horses were important):

And Whack-A-Mole!:

And this was the view from the hotel, as it is every year at Girlie Weekend:

And we laughed a lot, and shopped a lot, and had a gorgeous meal at lupo di mare, and I was clearly told what was “blog-able”, and I cannot thank these three enough for making it a great weekend.

I have much more to say about all of this, but it is Vacation Recovery Day, and I have tons of laundry to do, and I’m taking Monkey to the dermatologist in about an hour. So I gotta scoot.

Girlie Weekend rocked. Thanks, A, L & J. You guys are three of the best. (We missed a number of attendees, among them Misfit Hausfrau, who at least we managed to have dinner with on Thursday.)

Can’t wait until next year.