I have to say, it’s going pretty well.
As far as the cravings, they are not bad at all. I didn’t expect they would be. There have been one or two days this week I’ve thought, “This is the kind of day I would really be looking forward to smoking that cigarette tonight.” But then I know I’m not going to have it, and it doesn’t bother me that much.
I’m not surprised that I don’t miss it more. The last month, I’ve been pretty ambivalent about smoking. Instead of seeing it as something I do for me — which, could it be the stupidest thing I could’ve done for me? — I’ve realized that I didn’t want to do it anymore. I was tired of building it into my evening. Beside which, it’s not a very smart habit. I think I mentioned that.
I will say I am having some trouble calling it a night without my nightly habit. I’ve been getting to bed at 11 p.m. or after for a week — not counting my crazy weekend — and that doesn’t bode well for my mornings. And I need my mornings, primarily because I need my morning workouts.
The biggest plus is that I get to hang out with Dan when he gets home. I’m not focused on finishing up my chores so I can go outside for a cigarette. Of course, that may be part of the problem. Instead of finishing up my chores, I hang out with him with he comes home, make sure he has something decent to eat, chat about our days. And *then* clean the kitchen.
My children’s bedtimes have become a problem again, too. I spend an hour — an hour! — getting my children to bed. And that’s after the whole bath/book/lullaby/bed routine. M regularly gets out of bed while I’m trying to read to the girls (we’re working on The Magician’s Nephew, Book 1 in the Chronicles of Narnia). He asks for water, he asks for medicine (for his ears), he asks for cars. It’s ridiculous. I have a 3-year-old with bags under his eyes because he’s not falling asleep until 9:30 p.m. Flora, of course, insists on reading herself to sleep. Kate’s the only one who regularly passes out, and I’m pretty sure that’s just because she’s spent the evening Expending! All! Her! Energy!
Anyhoo, there are a couple of things I am trying to create that nightly nightcap. One is a cocktail, something fun and different, something to try with my husband. I bought him a bottle of green chartreuse for his birthday (yesterday), and I need a couple other little things so I can fool around with mixed drinks a little. (Mom, don’t worry, I’m talking about one cocktail after the children are in bed.) I’ve been directed to a great website (h/t @thejqs) and a book that I am going to put on my Kindle (h/t @unclecrappy and @thejqs).
I am also thinking about trying to keep my nails polished. I polished them over the weekend — because wedding reception! — and I liked the way they looked. M, on the other hand, disliked it immensely that my nails were a deep sparkly red. He declared them icky. Although he did ask later if I could make my nails blue. I told him I could. His response, “Let’s do that, then.”
Finally, I may just try to dig my knitting stuff out of M’s closet, and relearn that. I bet I could knit a pair of socks in an evening! (h/t @katrinaravioli)
What do you do to keep your hands from being idle?
Red Pen Mama 
I don’t think you should skimp on that time with Dan. When all is said and done, are you going to look back and think, “I wish I had done more cleaning?”
Good luck with kicking the cig habit!
Thanks! It’s going well. And I like hanging out with Dan. He’s a fun guy!
I am totally going to Amen on the ‘talk to Dan’ post. I am 4 months to being childless, and am deeply grateful we haven’t been like a lot of our friends who have been only connecting over kid stuff and are now wondering if they are even still compatible. LOTS of divorces happen when the kids graduate. And believe me it feels like yesterday that the boys were 4 years old. Lately I’ve been wondering if I should have spent more time enjoying them and less time trying to corral them, because that time isn’t going to come back.
Sleep habits are a combination of relaxation strategies, family habits and genetics. Some kids are born needing less sleep or seem to be afraid they’ll miss something if they go to sleep and fight it. Taylor has to be told to be quiet if he couldn’t be asleep because he is up till midnight playing videos and then misses school – in the last semester of his senior year there isn’t a lot I can do about that. Although I keep threatening to turn off the wifi at 11, and if he misses school again I’m going to do it. The yoga was working for you and Flora, are you still doing it? Breathing exercises work for me, but it’s like any exercise, mental or physical, it only works if you repeat it ad nauseum. It is so frustrating to teach the same habits over and over again, but find what works for you and keep doing it. Kids like repetition – it matters less what you do as the consistency with which you do it.
Oh, yeah, Dan and I have always continued to “date” even as we’ve been raising our children. I’m grateful that we’ve been on the same page as far as being married first, parents second. It’s kind of leading to some of the next posts I’m doing.
Sleep: I honestly am at my wits’ end with bedtime. And, no, yoga has gone by the wayside. Because after a couple of months, I was the only one doing it. When Dan is home, it’s much easier. And I think that’s the crux of the problem: I’m one parent trying to put three children to bed (still). I keep thinking at some point my girls will put themselves to bed, but so far, no go. M is exhausted, and I don’t know how to impress on him that he needs to actually go to sleep when he goes to bed.
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