Battle Fatigue

It’s been a week of frustration and logistical … nightmares is probably too strong a word — although I did find myself on McNightmare Road yesterday at 4:30 p.m., so maybe not. Logistical inconveniences, let’s say that.

I haven’t posted much because I am not feeling very positive. But I need to vent a little bit.

You can click away any time.

After vowing and struggling to retake the reins at home, success is minimal. I blame the weather. And also the fact that two of my three children cannot easily be picked up and carried protesting into the house.

I repeatedly assert my authority at home. Mileage varies. Last night, I sent both girls (at separate times) to bed without their night time treat or night time show. Flora dug in her heels and refused to finish her homework — refused, outright. Kate had a meltdown about something else, and started yelling at me. I was already fed up, so I pulled rank, completely and absolutely.

Flora is not supposed to play outside or watch TV before her homework is done. But short of picking her up and carrying her into the house as soon as we arrive home, I’m not sure how to enforce that with my 7-year-old. She has lost playing-outside privileges and television privileges until NEXT MONDAY at this point.

It doesn’t help that she is on her second round of antibiotic eyedrops for pinkeye. YAY! The incomparable @mattieflap watched Flora at her house yesterday (with her adorable redheaded 3-year-old). Flora was well-behaved, although even there she was homework-resistant. She must have used all her “good behavior” at @mattieflap’s house because at home she was surly, grumpy, and non-compliant.

The last straw came as I was sending her to her bedroom with her undone homework and she told me to shut up.

As @quickredfoxy said on Twitter today, “Sometimes all we can do is love them.”

I am holding on to my own desire to dissolve into a sobbing mess by the very ends of my fingertips. I have a girl-date Saturday night (Hunger Games!) — one that I was asked to change or cancel, and I opted not to, which is another source of friction in my life — that I plan to attend and enjoy. I had made these plans and then got word of a family event, and the conflict is direct and head on. Thanks to my husband and parents, my children can still attend. And really, I think that’s the most important thing.

I don’t know that all parties agree with that assessment.

Oh, and my dang back hurts all the time right now. I sit down almost all day during the week (two 15-minute walk breaks don’t really count as exercise), and then I’m on my feet nearly all evening and weekend. My back, from my lower back through my sciatic nerve, and my poor aching swollen feet, need some TLC soon. I have a chiropractic appointment tomorrow, and I finally bought sneakers. So let’s hope that even if the lunatics continue trying to run the asylum, at least my back will stop aching.

Is it going to rain any time soon? My kids need some indoor time. *I* need some indoor time — the clothes and paper sorting that is getting neglected because of this crazily fantastic weather is daunting.

And you’ll have to come back next week for Project: Food Budget. Sorry about that. I just don’t have it in me.

What’s keeping you going this week?

10 thoughts on “Battle Fatigue

  1. Hang in there, sweetie!

    If it were me, (and you can tell me to stuff it, I’ll understand) I would have grounded Flora outright for the ‘shut up’ comment. I grounded Liam for a week last year because he tried to kick me when I went to a neighbor’s house to bring him home.

    And the thing you have to remember is, you ARE bigger than they are and you CAN bodily carry them inside. Is it easy? Hells no. But it can be done. I can still haul Liam if I have to. Of course, I’ve been hauling a nearly 40 lbs toddler around so I’ve got stamina built up. But still. If they won’t obey you by voice, they’ll have to be shown that it only gets worse if they don’t. This will not be a popular opinion, but I have been known to spank my children when the need arises. It’s infrequent and generally only one or two swats. But it gets the point across. Again, I understand if this is just not something you’re willing to do. I have boys and sometimes I just CANNOT get through to them otherwise.

    Of course, none of this is even one tiny iota of fun for you and grounding your child is like grounding yourself. I think the warm weather is bringing the ants in the pants out in ALL the kids. they’re stuck in school all day, they can practically taste summer vacation, and they’re surly that they can’t have what they want.

    **hugs** I’ll buy you a giant beer on Saturday. Or a Maker’s Mark straight up.

    • Oh, she was losing privileges right up until “shut up”. and then she was grounded. She’s going to read a lot in the next few days. In her room. Plus, I think she might have to help me sort through some of those clothes I need to go through.

  2. First, big huge BIG hugs. Deep breaths. You can do this.

    Second- yup, been there, so many times. Especially with One. In first grade, I made her stay at the table until she finished her homework. At one point, it got so bad that she tore her homework to shreds, broke 4 pencils, and FLIPPED THE TABLE OVER. You are not alone. The great news is that it calms down. I promise, it really does. Stick with routines and strict rules- at least,that’s what I do, and it seems to really work. (Not perfect…obviously. But things are so, so much better now.)

    I’ve been through exactly what you’re describing, and I’m sure there’s more to come. And this is why we need nights of hilarity and wine.

    • And wine and/or beer? Haluski from the local fish fry? Dogs that will wear out my younger daughter so she sleeps until 9 a.m on Saturday?

      A few suggestions. 😉

      • Hm, okay, you’re right. I have more to contribute than just internety hugs. 🙂

        My haluski is WAY better, by the way.

  3. Well, this week has been frustrating, but what keeps me going is the small stash of Hershey’s special dark chocolate I found and had forgotten that I’d squirreled away in the pantry!! It’s like Christmas for my mouth.

  4. Ugh. That’s how last week was for me. Whining, crying, clingy, smartass toddler + baby beating me up from the inside. (Thankfully I haven’t yet reached smart mouth7 yr. old stage yet, though I know it’s coming.) I don’t know how I get through those weeks. Emotional eating, mostly, which I know isn’t healthy. But hey! It gets me through.

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