I celebrated the New Year on my couch, with my husband, a kiss, a glass of Asti Spumanti, and a sleeping infant on me.
Hey, I’ve had worse New Year’s Eves.
The past two weeks I have been struggling with “baby blues” and/or post-partum depression. The slightest thing can make me cry — even good things, like Kate sitting in my lap at the end of the day, declaring that “this” — sitting in Mommy’s lap before bedtime — is her favorite part of the day.
Most of the struggle has to do with the fact that I sincerely feel I cannot take care of my family. I’m quite overwhelmed, and a number of mornings lately I have debated about getting up at all.
As I told my husband, if the morning comes that I decide I’m NOT getting up for nothing, then I’ll consider medication.
So far, I have gotten up. I even have showered almost every day!
I guess it’s good that I recognize how I am feeling. And I know I have the resources to do what I can do. And I have a good husband who can hear me and help me.
So: Here’s to a new year, and a new start.