At my last midwife appointment, which was Monday, I scheduled almost the rest of my midwife appointments. Except for December. Who knows if I’ll even make it to December.
In three weeks, I have my 34 week appointment. Then two weeks after that, I have my 36 week appointment. And then I start going every week.
I was totally caught off-guard. I think part of it was that I thought my EDD was 12/10, and it’s actually 12/6. I missed that memo.
You’d think I’d be ready for these developments, wouldn’t you? I’ve done this before. Kinda.
And yet, I’m having a hard time wrapping my head around the fact that the end of my pregnancy is looming on the horizon.
Physically, I am ready. My back hurts, my hips and pelvis are killing me; I cannot sleep through the night. Moving in general is hard, and bending over, impossible. I’ve been asking Flora to pick up dropped items around the house for a couple of weeks now.
“Why can’t you bend over?” she asked, finally exasperated by my fifth or six request last night to “get [object lying forlornly on floor] for me”.
I pointed to my belly and said, “You wouldn’t be able to bend over with this in the way, either.”
She giggled. I’m so happy I amuse her.
Emotionally, I’m in turmoil. I can feel my anxiety ratcheting back up. The current issue I am having is: I don’t know where I’m delivering this baby.
IF things continue to go well, I won’t have to induce.
And IF I don’t have to be induced, I can have Le Bud at the midwives’ birthing center.
Not in a hospital.
Of course, IF I don’t have to be induced, then I have to actually go into labor. Which I haven’t done (naturally) before. Which brings up (for me) a whole ‘nother host of questions and anxieties.
In terms of house preparedness, we aren’t ready, either, and Dan and I need to sit down and work out a schedule. When to clean out Le Bud’s room and get it set up for him, for example. When to put the crib back together. Another teeny issue: I don’t have boy stuff. Not a onesie, not an outfit — actually come to think of it, I don’t have ANY baby clothes any more. I need crib sheets, too, and probably some non-girlie blankets for swaddling.
And diapers. And wipes.
Uh, I have to go make a shopping list. What do babies need again? Leave your favorite essential(s) in the comments!