Last night, all of my dreams (it seems like I had about three) had the exact same theme.
Each time, I was going on a trip somewhere, usually with a group of people and usually flying to a foreign country (France, Germany, Japan, I think).
And each time, things were quite a bit out of my control. There were late flights, and long lines and lost luggage, and running through terminals looking for the right gate. Usually my mom or dad or Dan was with me telling me that things were going to be okay, even though everything seemed very stressful.
Now, I’m no dream therapist or anything, but I’m pretty sure my subconscious was releasing a lot of feelings I was having about my pregnancy. The feelings of being overwhelmed and not in control (I am overwhelmed, and not in control, let’s face it). At the same time, it was reminding me, through the presence of very important people in my life, that it was going to be okay.
This is part of an e-mail my mom sent the other day:
“Having a baby should be a joy and wonder. You had it with Gabriel. Now the stress and worry over your pregnancies have taken over that feeling. In my prayers I talk to God and ask Gabriel to help you feel the peace and joy of new life and bringing another little baby into our family. Take a deep breath and ask for God’s protection. Ask Him to take the stress and deal with it because you can’t. With all that you have going for you in your life you want to be at the top of your game. Your girls and Daniel need you.”
I woke from the dreams this morning surprisingly unstressed. It was like receiving a reminder that sometimes in life, one is just a traveller.
And I just have to go where things take me.