Lost: Across the Sea

*SPOILER ALERT*

Thanks to day-long, pregnancy-induced nausea, this is a day late.

But I’ll be totally upfront: it was pretty anticlimactic.

I was not at all surprised that Jacob and… can we call him MiB? Because, technically speaking, the MiB we saw most of this episode was NOT THE MiB! He was Jacob’s nameless brother. Oh, he had characteristics of Smokey/MiB that we all know and love: he was world-weary and cynical; didn’t think too much of his fellow humans; and had a burning (and ill-defined) drive to get off the Island.

I’m going to bitch first:

I couldn’t get over Allison Janney as Crazy Mother. I couldn’t get into the character. I just saw Allison Janney with a bad dye job and looking muy exausted. And I love Allison Janney; C.J. from the West Wing is one of my favorite TV characters ever, but I just kept thinking: “Allison Janney”. Not “Crazy Mother”.

After all, while a bit obsessed with the staying on the Island and protecting this pretty golden light coming out of the ground, she didn’t really seem all that nuts. And she certainly didn’t take the time to actually explain anything, did she? Thanks, Mom.

I’m going to yell here: WHY IN THE HELL DOESN’T JACOB’S BROTHER HAVE A NAME? Does it not matter? I find that hard to believe. Does Crazy Mother not remember any names from… well, I was going to say from wherever she is from, but maybe she doesn’t know any names period. Maybe she’s been alone and crazy FOREVER on the Island, and so she’s got Jacob and That Other Kid. I mean, really.

What did Jacob’s brother tell the people when he wandered into their camp? Call me the Dude? I’m The Stranger? It doesn’t really matter because my brother’s going to kill me and the Smoke Monster’s going to assume my likeness, but my brother will know it’s not actually me so he wouldn’t use my name anyway? COME ON, PEOPLE.

Jacob was a whiny sissy boy, and not exactly the Zen-like figure we’ve come to know. “How come you make the rules?” “You love him better.” “It was supposed to be him.” Wah, wah, wah, kid, cry me a river. And not exactly shy with his fists, either, when things weren’t going his way.

Which, of course, means Jack is the perfect one to replace him.

The last 10 or 15 minutes at least made it worth it. We know Jacob’s brother was responsible for the donkey wheel (if not actually completing it, at least conceiving of the idea). We know who the Adam and Eve skeletons in the cave are now. (I found that part very poignant.)

An interesting (to me) side note: Jacob’s brother killed Crazy Mother with that large ceremonial knife without them exchanging a word before he did it. (Pretty chicken shit, Jacob’s brother.) However, when Ben killed Jacob they had an extended conversation (and I don’t think Ben killed him with that knife — as Dogen later gave it to Sayid to kill Not Locke). I guess maybe it doesn’t matter; Jacob, while long-lived, isn’t a smoke monster himself. It just seemed significant at the time I was watching.

Do we think that golden light was actually the Smoke Monster all along? (Me: Yes.) And Jacob released it by tossing his (nearly dead?) brother down there? And Jacob felt pretty bad about that, and his guilt kept him tied to the Island and to Smokey all these long years? With occasional forays “across the sea” to recruit candidates, of course.

I’m off to do my Lost homework and see what the pros think. I don’t know how they’re going to finish explaining this shit in three and a half hours. But I sure am looking forward to watching them try.