Minor Bump

At breakfast on Thursday, Monkey asked, “Where am I going today?”

I told her to St. J’s and then to her dayschool (DS).

(I’m very lucky Monkey is an adaptable child. She goes three different places over the course of five days: Monday and Friday, she’s at DCL; Tuesday and Thursday, she’s at St. J’s till about 11 a.m., and then at DS; Wednesday, she’s at DS all day.)

Monkey’s response? “Yay. I like school.” What she said next stopped my heart: “I don’t like DS so much, though. The other kids are mean to me.”

I tried not to flip and yell, “WHAT??” Instead, I calmly (I think) asked what she meant, and who was mean to her.

She told me that “L” had started being mean to her. “She sings funny songs about me. And she won’t share the teeter totter with me.”

I advised her to ask L to stop doing whatever it was that bothered Monkey, or hurt her feelings. “And if she doesn’t, you can tell a teacher,” I said.

“Yeah. And R’s not my friend anymore. She plays with L now.”

On the upside, she picked a boy, N, to be her new best friend. On the downside, she’ll probably be off in a corner kissing him in another week or so.

I knew I would come up against this as the mother of girls. I’m kind of bummed it’s started already. I hope I can guide her through it. I am wondering if having Monkey tell a teacher is a good idea.

On the other hand, nothing makes you feel more like a mama bear than when your child is hurt — even when it’s “just” her feelings. I want to wade into that crowd of 4- and 5-year-olds and crack some heads.

That’s probably overreacting, though.

What would you do? What have you done?

One thought on “Minor Bump

  1. I have done (and continue to do) what you told Monkey to do: give the offending child a “message” (Montessori style) to stop the behavior. If the child doesn’t stop, go tell a teacher.

    If that doesn’t work, resist the urge to rush to school and slap the kid around yourself. It might make you feel better but you will end up with your face splashed across the “Today” show with Matt Lauer up in your grill asking “How Could You?” when any idiot knows that when you mess with MY CHILD you are asking for a smackdown. Oh, and you will go to jail. A major bummer.

    Go talk with Monkey’s teacher. Nine times out of ten I find out it is misinterpretation by my kid, and not intentional miscreant behavior by the other kid, that is the problem.

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